5 Ways to Quiet the Negative Self Talk and Own Who You Are

Loving your body can be a challenge. I've come a long way in my self-love journey from my eating disorder days, but I’d be lying if I said I don’t ever feel insecure in a bikini. It’s human nature to analyze, dissect, and pick apart things we want to change. However, feeling confident has nothing to do with your exterior and EVERYTHING to do with your mindset.

I’ve hit a point in my life where there are far more exciting things to spend my time on than worrying about how *I think* others perceive my body. Despite whatever insecure thoughts might creep in, gone are the days where I let stretch marks, cellulite, or pimples keep me from having fun and living my life.

Here are 5 action-worthy tips to quiet the negative self-talk and show the world what you’re made of:


1. Reframe your mindset.

When the inner critic comes out, it tends to deal in extremes and it’s often not an accurate reflection of our lives. Speak to yourself like you would to a dear friend. Instead of saying “I hate the cellulite on my thighs.” Turn it around and say, “I love my strong thighs, because they take me where I need to go. And yep, I have cellulite. Who doesn’t? It’s not a big deal.” The art of positive thinking goes a long, long way, I promise you.

2. Recognize your triggers.

Practice becoming more aware of when negative self-talk rolls in. Are you scrolling through Instagram comparing your life to stranger's? Is it after you finish eating and feel a little over-stuffed? Catch yourself in those moments and see if you can pinpoint exactly what actions lead to those negative thoughts, and write it down. Then, see if you can turn those negative thoughts into positive actions.

Take Action: If overeating triggers the negative self-talk, can you practice tuning into your body? Try a weekly meal prep, so you don’t wait until you’re weak and ‘hangry’ to finally make food. When you feel yourself getting full, tune-in. Don’t feel like you need to finish everything on your plate. If you’re having a tough time navigating this kind of self-control, seek professional help. I definitely did!


3. Surround yourself with people who make you feel good.

Attract the people who bring love, light, and happiness into your life. Repel the people who make you feel bad about yourself. Simple as that. There’s no need to keep that energy around, and there’s certainly no need to feel remorse for cutting those kinds of people out of your life. Bless them, and send them away. Your tribe matters, create one around you that you can go to for support, celebration, and compassion.

4. Bravely accept your imperfections.

You are who you are, and that is your power. It’s up to you whether you choose to work it or curse it. When I see women who are unapologetically themselves, it makes my heart happy. With social media and pop culture always in our face and at our fingertips, it gets harder to love ourselves. But, the reality is when you do you and you do it unapologetically, you’ll become the best version of you. And that kind of joy and positive energy is what makes this world a better place.


5. Recognize that inner beauty conquers ALL.

At the end of the day, your personality is what shines through every.single.time. Looks might be the first impression, but once you’re past that, who you are to your core moves mountains. As the saying goes, I'd rather be pretty smart, pretty kind, pretty funny, and pretty frickin' strong. Confident women who are happy and kind to others are radiant human beings. Strive to be so comfortable in your own skin that you don't feel the need to compete or compare.


I want to live out the rest of my days feeling good in my skin. And I want to surround myself with a tribe that does the same. I refuse to waste my energy hating on myself, and you should too. While I still have old-patterned thoughts from my E.D. days, I feel so much stronger and self-aware today. If what I've learned through my battles with self-love could help just a few of you, I'd say it was well worth going through it.

Thank you to my Athleta fam for sponsoring this blog post, and for supporting all women in owning who they are. You can shop all of my favorite Athleta swim styles below. Athleta’s suits are super cute with the right amount of cheek coverage, so if you’re into water sports like me, everything will stay in place. Haha!

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